Rebel Without a Cause

 It took nearly 7 ½ years for me to realize that group exercise offers so much more than the solitary existence of working out alone. I never thought much of having company working out because when I was marathon and ultra-marathon training it was either in the dark or exclusively by my lonesome. In those years a half lifetime ago I relished running solo because I thought of myself as James Dean: “A Rebel Without a Cause” and fancied myself so unique that my crippled personality would never accept training in a group as many of the successful runners did. When I joined EQ in April of 2003 I thought I would try to recapture the fitness I had left behind because of alcohol and drug addiction. I had gained a lot of weight because I had stopped running.  I did a modest job but gone was the feeling I was  invulnerable as running used to make me feel. I plodded on however, signed on with several of the elite trainers here but that too failed because my ego and the imagined need for autonomy in my workout sessions. I just thought I could do it myself.

   I also used to think that working out with mostly women would be embarrassing to my male ego because of my new physiology had replaced my “ripped” body during my halcyon days of 100 miles a week.  My competitive nature would be hard pressed to accept that I was getting my ass kicked by anybody.  But spinning changed that because I didn’t have to watch metronomes performing in perfect rhythm with the instructor.  With spin I could do it at my own pace in terms of pedal stroke speed and how much resistance I would put on the red dial. I did have the beginning advantage of strong legs from my days as a runner and so I used that as my building block to start my road back to fitness. I begin my 20th month this September and it has changed my life during the time I am here at EQ and now during the other 23 odd hours I am out in the real world. I have lost the feeling of the uniqueness but maintained it through my energy instead of my letting my ego run riot. Spinning has altered my course in so many ways as I have told you ad nauseam but I don’t have to be alone anymore not with the friends I have made here. I better stop now before I get too sappy.