Special Edition KSC

So good that I did not prepare for an hour and a half with the Queen of Spin today lest I be recalcitrant and opt for a ticket to ride tomorrow instead. But I know that I can “Trust Mommy” feeling secure that she will bring us along at just the right challenging pace to leave us spent but with just enough recovery for Thursday.  

And that she did, as I am here to report. The Evil Woman was spectacular today even though I hated just about every song she played. I was hoping that with 90 minutes she might relent and play one of my “hokey” songs but alas it was her rhythm of the road that just leaves me tone deaf at times. No matter her charisma and charm trump music selections every time. It was indeed a great ride.  

After my two episodes of precipitous glucose drops, I was totally prepared. I had my Gator Ade, protein bites and some glucose tablets, the latter being supplied to me by our Guardian Angel who does everything and anything for everybody without a word behind the scenes. Those of you who read KSC know whom I am talking about. 

Nancy Kaplan who I didn’t think read any of my blogs came up to me after class today and wished me well on my own bumpy terrain and then added something even more special. She said that although most of us don’t spend time together outside the club we do form a closeness in the hour or so that we do and that we do care for one another. Nancy Kaplan, she just doesn’t look great and shop she is one of the Sweet Hearts of KSC.  Thank you Nancy.  

Structure vs. Trance Induction

As I look backward from the end of a session atop my Schwinn I feel like there is really no discernible difference between a cadence filled class or one that is put together like Jambalaya. What I mean to say is that at the end of each version of the ride I am soaking wet, my left hand and foot have lost some circulation and I am of course gasping to regain my normal heart rate.  

Both entertain me and both move me closer to some elusive fitness level that escapes definition at least to this point anyway.  What is the difference then?  If you would ask each instructor they would say quite a lot.  But is there?  Order is never a bad thing unless I am lacking the discipline at that particular hour.  I don’t think it’s about being lazy, as I have already told you I am exhausted with both regimens.  The structured class that I love to participate in fascinates me and inspires me each and every time and challenges me and keeps me focused.  The unvarnished version is unusually extemporaneous and moves me viscerally, which results in an inspiration where writing is a stream of consciousness rather than reporting with finely chiseled narratives that only KSC* brings me to.  

So where am I?  Split I guess if you were to push me for my personal preference. In KSC there is an unparalleled dedication to craft and in Tripp’s class the passion he exudes lifts me like an anti-gravity machine.  It’s all good from here and the variety keeps me from the jelly donuts I so used to crave. 

*KSC- Kristen’s Spin Class kristensspinclass.blogspot.com

It won't take long:

 http://innerknockings.blogspot.com/2011/06/without-air.html

Face Card

What can I say to all of you that have brought me through every trial, tribulation and jubilation that I have experienced in these past 17 months other than the words thank you? Hardly seems an appropriate phrase given the semantics that are available to me in this the English Language but they will have to do until another one is invented. 

Today as I started to take my place in “left field”, #41 I had an overwhelming felt sense of love, serenity and a well being that has been absent from me in what seems like eons.  It was so palpable the only way I could hold back my tears was to take in the deepest breath of my life.  Kristen awakened me out of my trance-induced state when she asked: Are you ready John McQueen? (I thought I was Jack Briant). I of course nodded dutifully and then spied Ari and Lizzie who motioned me next to them and out of hiding I came. I really dig these two the love is like whipped cream on a mocha latte.  It gives me chills.  

Spinning became a seminal moment in my life when I decided to take up this dedication and what it has allowed me is to “Put on the Jack” but it’s never a disguise because it allows me to be authentic without the restraint of seeking an agenda other than enjoying the camaraderie that has evolved for me here in the CS.  In other words…Well you know how I feel at least some of you do. 

I love it when KG talks about her children and today when she mentioned her son it made me think about how fully associated she is all the time in the Lavender Palace. She was telling her son a story and when she said that he wanted her to calm down it must have been because he was seeing his mommy like she is with us: emotionally enrolled, charismatic and (my favorite) authentic. That kid Hunter is a smart boy I am so sure. 

Hey no one really comments here but does  anyone have some suggestions for what will be my 300th post in about a week or so? I love to write so coax me just a bit I love to be stroked. 

HDWS. I liked this one Kristen. 

Stepping Stones

 I have been stumbling of late and out of time with my spin regimen like today when I was going to blow off Tripp and Kristen and sit at home and lament my plight. There are times one must just push through the thoughts that inhabit the mind no matter how legitimate they may seem and get up and move. A.A. says bring the body and the mind will follow. That’s exactly what I had to do today and I got lucky because it was a half-day, last day of school and those that populate KSC in 8 seconds left an opening for me and I jumped on it. 

Most of my perspectives in class have been from the center of the CS in row 3 or in the first row but today I found myself in deep left field in #41 and completely out of sight from the Evil Woman. It did leave me with the thought I could just lollygag through what is always a breathless experience.  And except for the last five minutes of class I followed diligently along to Kristen’s call.  For the first time I felt like an outsider to this exclusive club but feelings aren’t facts and my emotional malaise will pass in time.  

Stumbling blocks make for difficult passage especially when traveling in the dark or when we have excuses to just stay in bed. However stumbling blocks can turn into stepping-stones, it’s all in the lens we choose and if we decide that problems are just situations and are really another growth opportunity presenting itself.   

Oh Jack!

It almost feels like forever since I have been to class even though it was only Sunday with Carolyn Mellace. Life sometimes takes priority over spin class but today I think I need it to rebalance myself from the vertigo of the last two days.  Let’s see if taking two classes is not a good idea.

So as I scribe between the two sessions my day has been preempted and what was a void has filled itself to the brim. I am ever so grateful to have this space to move back into realignment because here there are no personal issues that I have to deal with firsthand. It is my escape and the pressures of my own personality can be submerged into the bliss of sweat and the breathless state.  Those that have read my very now very open life will eventually retreat to my fanciful tales here as the fires of my relationships warm to room temperature.

Kristen took me out of myself today and as she reminded us about not having expectations from others, I felt a serene wave pass over my physiology.  That seemed to have me engaged perfectly in my pedal stroke between resistance and speed. There I felt like Goldilocks must have felt when she ate the little bears porridge and exclaimed it was  “just right”.  And so it’s on to Mr. Doherty and I suspect I will be a little more vociferous in his class, only because it is my wont to do so. Although in KSC I did let out two rather audible exhortations. For more catch me on Svengali later.

P.S. Images are not being loaded so I apologize I had a few but technology has a glitch for the moment.

Cee Lo and The Blue Sapphire to the Rescue

While I wasn’t in the mood for spin today I am glad that I did it anyway. I was feeling emotionally lethargic and I was bordering on depression. But the presence of familiar faces like Ari and Lizzie and the fact that Carolyn Mellace, The Blue Sapphire was teaching, I pressed on through the muddied waters that are my life right now. Mud settles eventually to the bottom and before long I will start to see things more clearly for what they are rather than what they feel like. 

Who said spinning was just riding a stationary bike? He must have been riding in an empty studio because cycling is my meditation that can actually take me out of any altered state I am in and put me in another one. Feeling like I was almost going through the motions this morning I was hoping for an escape to Witch Mountain and it came about 11:15. As fortuitousness would have it Carolyn plated: Forget You by Cee Lo Green. It was just what the doctor ordered because it launched me right out from under my malaise. I began to feel on even keel again and it reinforced what NLP* taught me that and me was that: Motion Creates Emotion. It would have been easier to turn to in my bed and keep the A/C on high and pretend to be in the somnolent state until this Sunday in particular was over.  

Feelings aren’t facts is what a 1935 12 step program espoused but today the fiction of emotion almost kept me in repose, I am most grateful I jumped my own fence.  

*NLP: Neuro Linguistic Programming. 

P.P.S.

11 More posts will make 300 of these short vignettes. I don't know where the time has gone but the discipline to write, hone my God given talent lies in the writing of KSC. All of my blogs thank you. If you have anything to share my readers, ( I know you are there) please do. 

Great Expectations

Saturday  in Kristen’s class and in a rare moment for me when I had lost focus, said “No Expectations”. I thought that odd out of context but as I came back into alignment I took it to mean that I could relax into my forte. Today like never before I felt my strength in the pedal stroke that gave me a sense of a powerful effort without strain. My face was relaxed, my timing was consistent and my breathing, oh my God my breathing was more in my control than it ever was.  No expectations? This was totally unexpected and that is why I have Great Expectations in the days and months ahead.  

Saturday KSC was as usual booked solid with a waiting list of 8 beyond the seated 55 and the hot ticket lives on with the Queen of Spin. And she was the ultimate “spin doctor” today weaving her extemporaneous soliloquy in with her encyclopedic knowledge of exercise physiology. It always seems to flow and when you speak Kristen, We do care what you say make no mistake we want your charisma which is why we’re here but we also want your acumen on how we are evolving right before your eyes.  (You know I don’t know the color of her eyes). 

I got to sit down before class with my favorite face couple Lizzie and Ari today and as we talked the mutual admiration they have for each other was shining like the most visible star in the heavens and with the purity of Ivory Soap before Marilyn Chambers took on a new vocation.  It just felt so good to sidle up to these two because they got me out of me. Please if you don’t know these young ones, you’re missing something their energy is contagious.  

Great Expectations. I have great expectations without having to expect too much.